All processes in the universe follow natural laws. It is true that quantum physics have surprised with the double-slit experiment and other experiments, but even in quantum physics, hopefully, we will discover clear physical laws. Humans often have an intuitive assumption that natural laws do not apply to us, for example in our relations with others or in how the society is built up. Human beings are products of evolution, and both genders have advantages and disadvantages in light of their gender. These differences make humanity strong.
The word virtue will be used in this article:
Virtue: All good moral qualities in humans. Toughness, patience, moderation, justice, willpower, wisdom and other qualities. These virtues develop real masculinity as it is meant to be developed. Nature wills such development. Masculinity is thus a positive force that protects and helps other people. Virtuous behavior can help with challenges produced within the psyche or challenges from the external world. Striving to live in tune with virtues is to live in tune with nature as it promotes growth of the individual. Women that strive for virtues will develop their feminine power to its maximum potential. They will then become the best version of themselves and bring out the best in others. Both genders seek the same virtues, but they often express themselves differently in the genders.
See article: Aristotle and the 12 virtues.
The modern world has a strong need for men to take back their masculinity. Masculinity is a force of nature that has faded over time. The decline of testosterone in men is often attributed to diet, lifestyle, environment, and alike. However, this explanation lacks the most important element, which is the psychological effect the modern world has on both men and women. Human beings are animals of evolution wandering blindly in a highly technological world. They wander with the very human, but mistaken assumption that pleasure is the highest good. The scene has changed from hunting, vast plains and psychological uncertainty to human rights and tall skyscrapers.
However, our brains are still the same. History has developed, but human beings forgot to take care of their own biology. Society today is physically much less demanding, but the psychological challenges are increasing. These are the challenges that must be met with virtue.
The lack of virtue is the root cause of the feminization of men. As a consequence, women have become more masculine. Humanity rebels against nature and natural law if they do not strive to live a virtuous life. The consequence is a society that will become hedonistic, primitive, sick and meaningless over time.
“People settle for a level of despair they can tolerate and call it happiness.”
Men and masculinity
Masculinity, in essence, is a force designed to protect societies, values and other people that cannot protect themselves. Mainly, it is men that develop this force to its maximum potential. This force will inevitably express itself in the willingness and ability to solve problems and in virtuous behavior. Many think that masculinity is about aggression and violence. This is only one aspect of masculinity, but an important one; the ability to be aggressive and use violence can be important, for example when defending yourself or others. Aggression and violence are not inherently negative. However, well-developed masculinity leads to higher ability to control oneself. Masculine people control their thoughts, emotions and behavior, and have a strong willpower. Notice that this level of self-control even produces stronger ability to solve problems. Thus, seeking virtues and being virtuous are signs of true masculinity in men. Truly masculine men will have a positive energy radiating about them, and they will have passion in things that they undertake. They lift other people up.
Language is power. The regular man, Achilles and Socrates
Many men have reduced the force of masculinity to "alpha" and "beta". This kind of categorical either/or thinking have led many men to strive for dominance between each other. They thus strive for things that ultimately lead to nothing - violence, gangs, money, status and sex. This is a primitive understanding of masculinity. Socrates proved this in his discussions about the legend of Achilles with the sophists. Achilles was a legendary warrior, but ultimately limited his potential to that of war. Socrates demonstrated that maintaining Achilles' warrior spirit is important in men, but that men should seek higher virtues in order to reach true masculinity and dominance: dominance over ideas. While Achilles was a man who took revenge on his enemies, Socrates brought out the best in his.
In reality, all men are designed with a potential to become an "alpha", in light of what nature has provided them of strengths and weaknesses. All men should thus strive to become the best version of themselves and develop their talents; "beta" only exists if people let it exist within themselves. This term expresses lack of self-development.
The development of the masculine force comes after years of hard work, both physically and intellectually. Machiavelli the philosopher recommends that a leader learns to become both a lion and a fox; the ability to use physical brute force, but also intellect. The most dominant human beings are those who seek knowledge and thereby become rulers over ideas and themselves. Philosophers such as Socrates, Nietzsche, Kierkegaard and others still rule over ideas, even after their death. Power should be sought to lift other people up, not for gratification of personal ego.
Lack of masculinity in art
Art and literature from ancient times or movies from the 80s applauded masculinity as a beautiful and heroic force. What made these movies and characters so attractive was the virtuous behavior of the characters. This is the reason many people fall in love with the characters and stories. Observing virtuous behavior in others is inspiring; a clear sign from nature that virtues ought to be developed.
The lack of masculinity is expressed everywhere in modern "art". For example, in movies and in music. The lack of virtue is making societies sick. Take for example modern rappers and music: they focus on money, women, foul language, sexualized behavior, and power. This brainwashes the viewer subliminally, even if the viewer only listens to the rhythm. Such "artistic expression" is the lowest form of expression as it only expresses humans' animal instinct. Artists from previous generations expressed their soul and higher values.
Men have 3 unconscious ideals - a simplified presentation:
1) Kierkegaard's concept of the "aesthetic" man - hedonism. Men often limit themselves to this as their highest ideal. This ideal assumes that pleasure is the highest good. This assumption deletes virtues and thus feminizes men; their development stagnates. These men create fundamental distrust in women towards men as those men can't be trusted; they value pleasure over growth of the soul (justice).
2) Ideal of Achilles or Hercules. They seek personal development, not only pleasure. All men have the potential to develop such characteristics. They can be evil or good in society, depending on what they learn. This article attempts to inspire men to become a good Achilles - this can only be done if one strives for virtues. Thus, Achilles has to by necessity look up to the Socratic ideal, even if he does not have the ambition to become a philosopher king himself.
3) Ideal of Socrates - The philosopher king. Like Hercules, but also seeks knowledge and enlightenment. Talent in philosophy and has a higher calling. One that promotes virtues and thus growth of the soul. The philosopher king can be a slave or a king; it doesn't matter as long as he lives by virtues. The philosopher king's ideas determine whether people like Achilles choose good or evil. See the story of Alexander the Great and Diogenes the philosopher.
The art that applauded masculinity from ancient times or from the 80s had Achilles and Hercules as ideals, with some hints toward the Socratic ideal. The ideal of Achilles is not easy to reach, but one can become like Achilles or Hercules through hard work. Achilles had many virtues that the hedonistic man is nowhere near to be in possession of. Most men, by instinct, have these heroes as their highest ideals. Movies like 300, Rocky, Predator (1987) and Scarface (1983) are good representations of these ideals in modern art.
The closest I have seen of the Socratic ideal expressed in modern art are characters like Henry Fonda in 12 Angry Men (1957) and the warrior Maximus in Gladiator. In real life, Muhammad Ali the boxer had some of the qualities that can remind of the Socratic ideal. As mentioned, the philosopher king determines Achilles' behavior; notice the positive effect of Muhammad Ali on other athletes that become better versions of themselves just by observing his ideas and virtuous behavior.
Machiavelli and Nietzsche are two of my favorite philosophers. These are often highly misinterpreted, and the misinterpretation has created many evil versions of Achilles throughout history.
"The strongest man in the world is he who is able to stand alone."
-Henrik Ibsen, En folkefiende 1882
Fight Club and expression of masculinity
The reason men do not fit into the classical masculine category anymore is because societies have become, physically speaking, too easy. Men do not strive for virtues as societies don't call for it. Masculinity is also spoken about negatively. Societies and men themselves are feminizing men. The root cause of the issue is thus the lack of proper education about virtue and character.
Societies are too A4 and does not open for the masculine force. The movie Fight Club expresses this idea in a creative way; the message of the movie is that men ought to live in tune with their masculinity and thus in tune with nature. If men do not express their masculinity, they will never reach their highest potential as human beings. Read further about this: Aristotle and the 12 virtues.
Men fall through repeated mistakes, but those that rise become strong
Men often learn to see their own true value in the beginning of their 30s, as the brain becomes matured and has better self-regulation. Strong role models are important for men in their critical period which lasts up to their early 30s. We men often commit many mistakes in that critical period because of our instinctual ideal of a ruthless Achilles. Strong and virtuous role models are important so that men can learn to use their warrior spirit in a reasonable way. A strong role model can demonstrate the positive effect of living in tune with virtues. Men grow stronger by mastering adversity.
"That which does not kill us, makes us stronger."
Gym and gaming are not good enough arenas
There aren't that many challenges in a comfortable society, such that men ought to create challenges for themselves. Most men express their masculine power in the gym or in competition in sports or gaming; these arenas do not lead to real masculine development or virtues. These arenas are too easy and do not develop the talents one might have.
Fasting from sex
Men should stop watching pornography permanently. They should fast from all sex when working on something - in boxing, the rule is to fast from sex 6 weeks before a fight. This is to truly feel the power of libido; a power that causes men to become lions if they learn to use it properly. Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson, David Haye and other boxers used this tool. Fasting gives back libido and it also positively affects your view on women. Libido is a positive force that one can use for self-development.
Do that which is difficult psychologically
Masculinity can be developed by doing things that are difficult psychologically. To be ambitious, to say what you mean regardless of controversy, to control oneself, to be patient and tough during adversity, to solve problems instead of whining, not looking for accept from others, daring to take risks and accepting one's imperfections, to be able to stand in difficult situations, to have clear principles, and to actually protect people when the situation requires it.
Women seek protection through psychological traits in men
A recurrent subject is that women like men that are tall, got money, status, power, are "players" etc. There are good reasons from our evolutionary past that these traits should be attractive. These are traits that seem important, but are illusory. Let us try to understand what these traits really mean.
Many men give up and attribute these preferences to the lack of morals in women. I have also had female patients who question their own morals because of such preferences. These preferences are not about moral, but about instinct. Women that have these preferences have their instincts working well, but they are not aware of what they are actually attracted to. Nature has made sure that women should prefer masculinity above all things, just as men prefer femininity above all things.
On closer examination of these traits - height, status, money etc., you realize that these traits create an impression of dominance. This is the underlying force that women are actually attracted to. This is because a dominant individual has the ability to protect and solve problems; the individual is masculine. This alone is a strong signal from nature to men to actually become dominant and masculine, regardless of what others say about it. That includes women who often interpret masculinity as aggressive behavior. True masculinity is about having supreme self-control.
All of the qualities mentioned above are thus not necessary. They only seem to be necessary and might work as bonuses; they are ultimately illusory for both men and women. As mentioned, these traits create the impression of dominance. I recommend that you become truly dominant. The road to true dominance and masculinity is to live in accordance with your values and to seek virtues. Living virtuously is living in tune with nature. If you are virtuous, you will be tough, just, brave, patient, fair and alike. This will cause you to be a real masculine force. Virtuous behavior will cause you to be dominant over yourself and thus you will become actually dominant. Read my article about Diogenes, which clearly shows the power of thought and how the slave Diogenes dominates Alexander the Great.
"He who conquers his desires is braver than he who conquers his enemies.
For the hardest victory is over self." -Aristotle
Aggression ought to be used reasonably. The effect of combat sports
Aggression is an emotion that must be used within the right context, for example when defending yourself, your family or others. Aggression can also be expressed in passion.
Aristotle the great philosopher expressed the idea of the golden middleway. The golden middleway expresses that it is wise to have balance in one's thinking and actual behavior. For example, imagine the virtue of bravery; if you are not brave, you will be cowardly - if you are too brave, you will be reckless. Thus, the wisest option is something in between. Notice that you cannot be brave without having the feeling of fear at the same time. Only those who feel fear and still pushes to do that which causes the fear can be considered brave, like someone who is afraid of heights but tries parachuting.
Combat sports are great in the modern world for men. Many people think that combat sports make one violent. The truth is that people who do combat sports learn to be less violent as they understand the damage it can cause. One gains respect for violence. Also notice that you are only truly "peaceful" if you have the ability to be violent.
I think it is important to be able to defend yourself. The ambition of fighting 3 at the same time is admirable, but remember that with intellect and dominance over ideas you can fight 3 million.